The Feeding Wars

At 6:30 in the evening, the little creature in his Graco chariot (we haven’t bought a baby throne yet) wheels into the dining area and parks in front of the table. The tv is on and no one dares to question his claim to the Nickelodeon channel.  While he is distracted by the absorbent and yellow and porous creature who lives in a pineapple under the sea, I wield the blue baby spoon (incredible! It changes color if the food it touches is hot! What a smart little spoon), and spoon out a dollop of gross, greenish albeit healthy, mushy food and thrust it into his mouth.

I think I ate Plankton!

I get this sense of victory, as his mouth opens automatically in a wide AAAH when he sees the spoon in his peripheral vision. Eyes are still focused on Spongebob Squarepants. Thank you, Spongebob.

A baby facial. Yey!

But true enough and sad enough, the glory, as Napoleon Bonaparte puts it, is fleeting.

 

You treat me like I am so naive, mother. Why don’t you shove that greenish ick in your own mouth?

 

The Little Creature loses interest in the nautical nonsense and he gets bored. That’s when it gets dirty and gruesome… like really gross-mush-flying-all-over-the-place-and-even-on-my-face gruesome.   A mush spatter analyst would have a blast examining the table cloth and Graco seat… and my shirt.

Enough disgusting food!

Every.

Single.

Night.

Granny and Phoebe’s Special Concoction

Granny and Phoebe’s (our helper) Special Twice Blended Concoction. Ingredients: boiled potatoes, boiled carrots, boiled squash, moringa leaves, chicken broth. Errr… yes, so it does look like the Little Crit’s Poop but it’s guaranteed to be good for the baby tummy…

… and yes, you saw right. That’s an image of my parents’ house and the street name on the saucer.  One of my dad’s  hobbies was to collect custom designed Noritake tableware.  You gotta admit, it’s a measure against crockery pilferage.  That’s not your house on the plate, you thief!

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